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The essential ingredient for greatness in nursing is compassion. Without compassion, you might as well come up with another name for "nurse" because without "care" it's not "nursing."
Recently, a local hospital was purchased by a larger organization and there were many changes including a decreased staffing level with more residents and interns. The nurses were very angry about the situation and their anger spilled out in their care. In fact, they forgot to "care."
Instead, they would perform duties as prescribed by the doctor but did not address the patients' typical needs, such as asking about pain or comfort levels. Patients became "tasks to be performed," things, not human beings.
On this day, I was, unfortunately, visiting the ER requiring care. The nurses were short staffed and it was a busy day. There was a lot being asked of them. I can empathize. But that is no excuse to being disrespectful.
The doctor cared for me that day. And the janitor gave me a blanket. While I was grateful to be well again, I was appalled by the lack of care by the nurses. And the sad thing is they don't appreciate how disrespectful they were or the impact of their actions. They don't realize they misplaced their empathy and compassion. Every patient was treated without "care" that day, and it reflects on our profession and the hospital.
You Make an Impact
When you are angry, irritable or unhappy, and you allow your emotions to drive your behavior, there is an impact:
- Your emotions are a distraction. It can cause you to make errors as you are so self-absorbed that you have difficulty focusing your attention on your patients. You neglect to empathize because you do not have the mental bandwidth and do not provide the care or the respect required of nurses. The conscious mind can only focus on one thing at a time. If you are emotional, then you are not able to think clearly.
- When your emotions take over, your mind gets left behind. You lose - and the patients lose - your compassion. When you are so upset that you cannot focus or you are too busy thinking about all you have to accomplish, you miss out on those moments you could share in caring for your patients. You may want to spend 20 minutes with them and you know you only have 3. Instead of being angry that you are too busy to have the 20, use those 3 minutes wisely. It makes all the difference.
- These negative emotions are stressful and drain your energy dry. You leave work at the end of the day exhausted. Your mind has been working overtime on maintaining the negative thoughts. It takes a lot of energy to remain angry. It is not a natural state; something has to trigger it and then you must "tend it" to maintain it over time. That's a lot of work!
Manage your emotions and your mood. It belongs to you. Decide the kind of presentation you want to make to the world and the kind of experience you want to enjoy as you greet people along your journey. Choose to be your best.
Focus on what you CAN do and what YOU can control; let go of what you have no control over. This is a huge relief! Much stress is harbored by focusing attention on trying to control that which you have absolutely no control. You can do little to impact how many patients are admitted or how sick they are; you can only control you - your thoughts, your emotions and your behavior.
Trade each moment for something of value. By staying present in the moment, you focus on what is right in front of you rather than holding onto anger over the past or what you don't have or frustration about the future and all you have yet to do. Be here now.
Let go of expectations. There can be a huge disconnect between the kind of nursing you want to deliver and the kind of nursing you can deliver given the current situation. You can only do the best you can do and on some days, well, you just get by. But when you do your best and you are respectful, when you care about your patients, even when you are busy, they will respect that and appreciate what you give them. People understand.
But people are not as forgiving when you are mean. It is disrespectful to treat another human as a problem or annoyance and there is no excuse to treat another human being disrespectfully.
When you disrespect others, you disrespect YOU. When you forget to care, you are also not caring for yourself.
Care about yourself. Remember why you became a nurse and what keeps you in nursing. Be the best nurse you can be - just for today - it's all you have anyway. Do the best you can do; make someone comfortable, pay attention to what your patient might need. Don't ignore them because you cannot give them what you want; give them what you can and they will be forever grateful.
Julie Donley is an addiction and change expert and author of Does Change Have to be so H.A.R.D.? Visit http://www.nurturingyoursuccess.com/ to learn more about her work, sign up for her newsletter and blog, or arrange to have her speak at your next meeting or conference.
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